APPENDIX

FINAL VERSION VS TRANSLATION OF SOURCES.

NB: Cancellations are identified by angled bracket and visual breaks added in order to emphasize original structures. Falling rhythms (as imposed by word or phrase boundaries) are underlined.










 

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5

 

A.

For the seven lakes, and by no man these verses:

Rain; empty river; a voyage,
             Rain, empty river,
             Place for soul to travel (or room to travel)

Fire from frozen cloud, heavy rain in the twilight
             Frozen cloud, fire, rain damp twilight.
Under the cabin roof was one lantern.
             One lantern inside boat cover (i.e. sort of
             shelter, not awning of small boat)

The reeds are heavy; bent;
and the bamboos speak as if weeping.
             Throws reflection on bamboo branch,
             causes tears.



B.

Autumn moon; hills rise about lakes
against sunset
             West side hills
Evening is like a curtain of cloud,
             screen off evening clouds
a blurr above ripples; and through it
             Then thousand ripples send mist over cinnamon flowers
sharp long spikes of the cinnamon,
             Fisherman’s flute disregards nostalgia
a cold tune amid reeds.
             Blows cold music over cottony bullrush.

C.

Behind hill the monk’s bell
             Cloud shuts off the hill, hiding the temple
borne on the wind.
             <1> Bell audible only when wind moves toward one,
             One can
             
             not tell whether the
             summit, is near or far,
             Sure only that one is in hollow of mountains.

D.

Sail passed here in April; may return in October
             Touching green sky at horizon, mists in suggestion of autumn
Boat fades in silver; slowly;
             Sheet of silver reflecting all that one sees
             Boats gradually fade, or are lost in turn of the hills,

Sun blaze alone on the river.
             Only evening sun, and its glory on the water remain.

E.

Where wine flag catches the sunset
             Small wine flag waves in the evening sun
Sparse chimneys smoke in the cross light
             Few clustered houses sending up smoke
             A few country people enjoying their evening drink
             In time of peace, every day is like spring.

F.

Comes then snow scur on the river
             Cloud lights world covered with milky jade
And a world is covered with jade
Small boat floats like a lanthorn,
             Small boat floats like a leaf
The flowing water clots as with cold. And at San Yin
             Tranquil water congeals it to stillness
they are a people of leisure.
             
             The people of Sai Yin are unhurried.

G.

Wild geese swoop to the sand-bar,
             Wild geese stopping on sand *
Clouds gather about the hole of the window
             Just outside window, light against clouds
             
Broad water; geese line out with the autumn
             A few lines of autumn geese on the marsh
Rooks clatter over the fisherman’s lanthorns,
                                                                   at their
             Bullrushes
[sic.] have burst into snow-tops
             The birds stop to preen their feathers.

* Actually the title rather than a line from the poem.

H.

A light moves on the north sky line;
             Fisherman’s light blinks
             Dawn begins, with light to the south and north
where the young boys prod stones for shrimp.
             Noise of children hawking their fish and crawfish
             Fisherman calls his boy, and takes up his
                                                                      wine bottle
             They drink, they lie on the sand
             and point to the marsh-grass, talking.

In seventeen hundred came Tsing to these hill lakes.
A light moves on the south sky line.

State by creating riches shd. thereby get into debt?
This is infamy; this is Geryon.
This canal goes still to TenShi
though the old king built it for pleasure

I.

K E I M E N RAN KEI
             [Tseng] Gate, gate of gleaming
             [Kodama] The auspicious clouds bright and colourful

K I U M A N MAN KEI
             [Tseng] knotting dispersing
             [Kodama] Twist and spread

JITSU GETSU K O KWA
             [Tseng] flower of sun, flower of moon
             [Kodama] The sun and the moon shed their rays

T A N FUKU TAN KAI
             [Tseng] day’s dawn after day’s dawn new fire
             [Kodama] Morning after morning.

 

J.

Sun up; work
             [Fenollosa] sun          go out          and work
sundown; to rest
             [Fenollosa] sun          enter            and rest
dig well and drink of the water
             [Fenollosa] dig          well              and drink
dig field; eat of the grain
             [Fenollosa] till          field              and eat
Imperial power is? and to us what is it?
                                              might
             [Fenollosa] Emperor’s power for me what is it?


The fourth; the dimension of stillness.
And the power over wild beasts.

TITLES

Tseng: Scenes of Hsiao-Hsiang
           A. RAIN
           B. AUTUMN MOON ON TON-ting Lake
           C. Monastery evening bell
           D. AUTUMN TIDE RETURNING SAILS
           E. Spring in hill Valley
           F. Snow on River
           G. Wild geese stopping on sand
           H. EVENING IN SMALL FISHING VILLAGE

Kodama:
           I. Auspicious Clouds Song

Fenollosa:
           J. Clod Beating Song